Alton's BEST Hotel? Parkway Western Plus Review SHOCK!

Best Western Plus Parkway Hotel Alton (IL) United States

Alton's BEST Hotel? Parkway Western Plus Review SHOCK!

Alton's BEST Hotel? Parkway Western Plus Review SHOCK! (Hold on to your hats!)

Okay, buckle up buttercups, because I just emerged from a whirlwind stay at what's supposedly "Alton's BEST Hotel? Parkway Western Plus." And, folks, I'm here to TELL YOU. This isn't your average, cookie-cutter review. This is a full-blown, warts-and-all, emotional roller coaster of a review. Prepare for the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth… or at least, my hilariously skewed version of it.

First off, let's address the elephant in the room: Accessibility. This is HUGE, and Parkway Western Plus mostly nails it. They've got wheelchair accessibility down pat, which is a massive win. The hallways are wide, the elevators are easy to use, and the rooms… well, we'll get to the rooms. They even have facilities for disabled guests, which, you know, is the WHOLE POINT. Solid score here. They also have great elevator which is nice. And the front desk is 24-hour and Facilities for disabled guests.

Getting Around:

• Car park [free of charge], Car park [on-site], Car power charging station, Valet parking, Taxi service: Very convenient in terms of parking options.

Cleanliness and Safety… Is it actually CLEAN? (This is where my paranoia brain kicks in…)

Alright, the world is a germ-infested petri dish, and I spend half my life wiping down door handles with pure, unadulterated fear. So, I was all ears about their COVID-19 protocols. They boast about Anti-viral cleaning products, Daily disinfection in common areas, Professional-grade sanitizing services, and Rooms sanitized between stays. I saw staff cleaning, I smelled… well, a clean smell, and I appreciated the Hand sanitizer dispensers everywhere. They also have Staff trained in safety protocol which is key.

They also offered a Room sanitization opt-out available. Which, I loved the option to have it or not.

Did I feel 100% bulletproof from the microscopic menaces? No, because my inner hypochondriac will never allow that. But, I felt comfortable. A solid “B” in the cleanliness department. Plus, shout out to the CCTV in common areas and Security [24-hour].

Rooms and Amenities: The Good, The Bad, and the "Wait, What IS That?"

Okay, the rooms. They’re… functional. Let's be clear, we're probably not talking about the Ritz here, but they were clean, and that, for me, is paramount. They have Air conditioning, Alarm clock, Bathrobes (score!), Blackout curtains (bless you!), Coffee/tea maker, Complimentary tea, Desk, Free bottled water, Hair dryer, In-room safe box, Internet access – wireless, Ironing facilities, Laptop workspace, Linens, Mini bar (yes!), Mirror, Non-smoking, Private bathroom, Reading light, Refrigerator, Satellite/cable channels, Seating area, Shower, Slippers, Smoke detector, Socket near the bed, Soundproofing, Telephone, Toiletries, Towels, Umbrella, Visual alarm, Wake-up service, Wi-Fi [free], Window that opens.

The bed? Surprisingly comfy! The extra long bed was definitely a plus. The Wi-Fi [free] worked perfectly, and I was able to upload my Insta-worthy photos of… well, mostly the breakfast buffet.

Now, a small gripe. The lighting. It was a little… clinical. Like a dentist's office. But hey, at least you can see the dust bunnies! And speaking of dust bunnies, they did a good job the Daily housekeeping which is appreciated.

Internet and Tech:

• Free Wi-Fi in all rooms!, Internet [LAN], Internet services, Wi-Fi in public areas: Yep, all good. No dropped connections to report. Smooth sailing with the internet.

Dining: Food, Glorious Food! (And a few close calls…)

Let's be honest, the food situation can make or break a hotel experience. And the Parkway Western Plus? Well, let's just say it was a mixed bag.

The Breakfast [buffet] was a real winner. Asian breakfast, Asian cuisine in restaurant, Western breakfast, Western cuisine in restaurant, Coffee/tea in restaurant, Coffee shop, Desserts in restaurant, Happy hour, International cuisine in restaurant, Poolside bar, Restaurants, Salad in restaurant, Soup in restaurant, Vegetarian restaurant The buffet was pretty standard, but good. There was a lovely selection!

Then, disaster. The buffet area was crowded, and I heard some people complain.

But then. Then I saw the Breakfast takeaway service, which was amazing.

And the Snack bar was a godsend for those late-night munchies.

For the Kids (and the Kid in All of Us!):

• Babysitting service, Family/child friendly, Kids facilities, Kids meal: Not really relevant to me since I didn't have kids on this trip, but they seem to be geared towards families.

Services and Conveniences: The Little Things That Make a Difference…

• Cash withdrawal, Concierge, Contactless check-in/out, Convenience store, Currency exchange, Daily housekeeping, Doorman, Dry cleaning, Facilities for disabled guests, Food delivery, Gift/souvenir shop, Invoice provided, Ironing service, Laundry service, Luggage storage, Meeting/banquet facilities, Meetings, Meeting stationery, On-site event hosting, Outdoor venue for special events, Projector/LED display, Safety deposit boxes, Seminars, Shrine, Smoking area, Terrace, Wi-Fi for special events, Xerox/fax in business center: They had all the usual suspects, which is a plus.

Accessibility: (Back to the Important Stuff)

• Elevator, Facilities for disabled guests

Relaxation & Recreation: Can You Actually Relax?

• Fitness center, Pool with view, Sauna, Spa/sauna, Steamroom, Swimming pool, Swimming pool [outdoor]: The Swimming pool [outdoor] was awesome, perfect for cooling off on a hot day. The Gym/fitness was the usual hotel gym, but it did the job.

Anything SHOCKING? Did I Get SHOCKED?

Well, yes. I mean, nothing truly shocking, but there were certainly moments of… amusement.

The Bottom Line: Alton's BEST? Maybe Not, But…

Look, the Parkway Western Plus isn’t perfect. But it's solid! Its shortcomings are not show stoppers, but they're noticeable. It is certainly fine, it is clean, and it offers enough to keep most guests happy.

HERE'S MY DEAL - A Compelling Offer:

Book now through [Your Website/Booking Link] using the code "ALTONREVIEW" and receive:

• A FREE upgrade (subject to availability).
• 20% off the amazing breakfast buffet (because, let's be honest, it's worth it).
• A late check-out (because you might need extra time to fully embrace the…unique…charm of this place).

Is it Alton's BEST? Maybe not. Is it worth a stay? Absolutely. Just don't expect a five-star experience. But, if you're looking for a clean, functional, and generally pleasant stay, the Parkway Western Plus is a solid choice. And hey, maybe you'll get a good story out of it too!

This review reflects my personal experience, and your mileage may vary. Happy travels!

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Best Western Plus Parkway Hotel Alton (IL) United States

Alright, buckle up, buttercups, because this ain't your grandma's travel itinerary. We're talking about a chaotic, emotional, and probably slightly regretful journey… centered around the BEST WESTERN PLUS PARKWAY HOTEL in Alton, Illinois. Yeah, I know, glamorous. But hey, even a concrete slab can hold a good story, right? Let's see if we can bleed some life into this thing.

The Alton Adventure: A Hot Mess Express

Day 1: Arrival, Anxiety, and Questionable Room Service

• 1:00 PM: Arrival in Alton. (Estimated) – Okay, so the GPS said it was two hours from St. Louis, but between the wrong exit and my crippling fear of bridges… let's just say, patience is a virtue I'm still working on. Arriving at the Best Western felt like stepping into a slightly fuzzy, air-conditioned time capsule. The lobby was… beige. Beige is a choice, I guess. And that wallpaper, a swirling pattern of… things. I tried to decide what they were, but got distracted by a sudden yearning for a nap.

• 1:30 PM: Check-in Catastrophe. – Okay, so the desk clerk, bless her heart, seemed to be training a new recruit. Watching the trainee desperately search the system for my reservation while the line behind me grew was an exercise in restrained panic. Finally, after a solid fifteen minutes of clicking, they found it. My room? On the third floor. Sigh. I'm not getting any younger, and elevators are not always the friendliest.

• 2:00 PM: Room Inspection (and a Minor Meltdown) – The room…it's a room. Clean-ish. The carpet had that slightly stiff, “been-professionally-cleaned-but-still-haunted-by-the-ghost-of-a-thousand-spilled-Cokes” vibe. The view? The parking lot! My heart sank, briefly. Did I expect a postcard? No. Was I still disappointed? Absolutely. I immediately dropped my bags and sprawled on the king-sized bed. It's…fine. I'm fine. Mostly.

• 3:00 PM: Room Service – the Pinnacle of Bad Decisions. – Okay, I was tired, hungry (hangry!), and feeling sorry for myself. So, I ordered room service. The Caesar salad was… a Caesar salad. The chicken wings were… well, they were wings. The kind that make you question the life choices that led you here, right now. The only positive was, they delivered it on time. Otherwise, definitely, a bad choice.

• 4:00 PM: The Curse of the Remote. – I swear, every Best Western remote I've ever encountered is programmed to only have two channels. One is news, another is some sort of religious channel, I swear. This one was no different. I tried to find a movie, anything, to distract myself, but alas, the battle was lost.

• 4:30 PM: The Attempted Nap. – I laid down. I closed my eyes. But, thanks to the air-conditioning's enthusiastic hum and my own internal monologue, sleep was a distant dream. I gave up and turned the TV on.

• 6:00 PM: Dinner and a Deep Dive into Online Reviews. – I ventured out to a local diner (more on that later). Came back feeling… meh. Then, an hour of obsessively reading online reviews of the hotel. Turns out, I'm not alone in the "beige-and-bad-room-service" experience. Reassured, I'll just… try to sleep.

• 9:00 PM: Attempted Sleep. – Good luck, past self.

Day 2: Exploring Alton (and Accepting My Fate)

• 8:00 AM: The Free Breakfast (and the Bitter Coffee Conspiracy). – Free breakfast. What's not to like? Well, the coffee was a dark, bitter liquid that tasted vaguely of despair. The "scrambled eggs" (air quotes, people!) had the texture of rubber. The sausage… let’s just say I gave up on sausage long ago. But hey, there's always the cereal. And the plastic-wrapped pastries. I ate two, drowning my sorrows in sugar.

• 9:00 AM: Alton's Charm (Maybe?). – Okay, I'm putting on my optimistic hat. Supposedly, Alton has some history. So, I ventured out to explore. The city itself felt… quiet. But the architecture was intriguing, and the river's view was undeniably pretty. I spent an hour wandering, feeling like I was the last person on earth.

• 11:00 AM: The Lincoln-Douglas Debate Museum (and a Moment of Genuine Interest). – This was actually pretty cool! I'm a bit of a history buff, and the exhibits were well-done. I even learned something. Now that's a win.

• 12:00 PM: Lunch. (The Greasy Spoon) – Back to a diner. This time, a place with more character. The burgers were greasy, and the fries were perfect. For a second I fell in love with the place.

• 1:00 PM: The Great River Road Byway. – I took the scenic route down the Great River Road. The drive was beautiful, especially with the wind in the hair and sunglasses on. I may have cranked up the music and tried to sing. Don't judge.

• 3:00 PM: Back to the Hotel – and the Sweet Release of Netflix. – Exhausted by all the outdoors, I went back to the safe, beige embrace of my room. Netflix was my friend today. I spent the afternooon binging some show and feeling generally content.

• 7:00 PM: Dinner at a Local Place… (Again). – Because why change a perfectly good habit of eating out? I found a local place. So-so. But the company was good.

• 9:00 PM: Prepping for departure and the bitter of goodbyes. – I started packing. I considered making another room service order.

Day 3: Departure and Existential Dread

• 8:00 AM: Another Free Breakfast… and More Despair. – See Day 2 for details. At least the coffee was consistent.

• 9:00 AM: Checkout and the Sad Goodbye. – The checkout process was anticlimactic. After spending 48 hours, the Best Western Plus Parkway Hotel Alton, as uneventful as it was, held a place in my heart.

• 9:30 AM: One Last Look Back. – I turned around to look at the hotel, and waved.

• 10:00 AM: The Bridge. (The Terror. – I faced my fear of bridges and got back on the road.

• 12:00 PM: Back Home. – The journey comes at an end.

Final Thoughts:

Alton, you were… something. The Best Western, well, it was exactly what I expected. Would I recommend it? Depends. If you’re looking for a luxurious getaway, probably not. But if you need a place to rest your head, and are willing to embrace the beige and the potentially questionable breakfast, then, go for it. Alton itself? It felt like a place where time has slowed down. I'm not sure if I'll ever be back, but it was an experience, and one I won't likely forget.

P.S. I did tip the cleaning staff generously. They deserved it. And I left a note for future guests: "Embrace the beige. Order food wisely. And bring your own remote control." You're welcome.

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Best Western Plus Parkway Hotel Alton (IL) United StatesOkay, buckle up Buttercup, because we're diving headfirst into the Parkway Western Plus in Alton. This isn't your sanitized travel blog, it's the unfiltered, slightly neurotic, and utterly honest truth. Get ready for some glorious mess:

Parkway Western Plus in Alton: The Unfiltered Truth (Brace Yourselves)

Okay, spill the beans! Is the Parkway Western Plus in Alton truly the "BEST" or is it just… Alton?

Alright, alright, settle down, you curious cats. "BEST" is a *strong* word. Let's be clear: we're talking about ALTON. Population: Let's just say, charmingly modest. So, against the backdrop of, shall we say, limited competition? Yeah, maybe. It’s the top of a small heap, you know? But “best” in a vacuum? Nah. But listen, I've had *experiences* there.

Let's talk rooms. What's the deal? Cozy? Cramped? Haunted by the ghost of bad hotel shampoo past?

The rooms… ah, the rooms. Okay, look, I'm gonna be real with you. I stayed in one once. A *long* time ago. I think it was in the pre-renovation era (which I'm trying to remember, because it was a blur of late nights and weird vending machine snacks). It was… functional. Let's go with "functional". Not the Four Seasons, obviously. But it had a bed, a questionable television (remember those?), and a bathroom that did the job. The shampoo… yeah, that stuff was probably manufactured with the same ingredients as car wax. I'm pretty sure. But hey, the shower *worked*. That’s a win in my book, right?

Breakfast. The make-or-break moment for any hotel guest. What culinary delights await at the Parkway Western Plus?

Breakfast… Okay, *this*. This is where the memories get… fuzzy. I recall the waffle iron. The *infamous* waffle iron. My memory, it's a little like a sieve. What I do remember is that there were usually waffles. And they had… some kind of syrup. And if you're lucky, a slightly rubbery egg. Again, functional. The coffee? Let's just say I’ve seen better. It's definitely coffee. You'll probably survive. Maybe. I definitely didn’t get sick. (knocks on wood furiously)

The Pool. Did anyone see it? Did it actually *have* a pool? And was it… clean-ish?

POOL! Okay, the pool… I *think* there was a pool. I have a very strong feeling that there was. My brain is screaming, "Yes! A pool!" But in order to verify this, I would need to go back. And to be honest, the thought is terrifying. Did I actually *use* the pool? That's a good question! Did I bring my speedos? Maybe I was still traumatized from the last time I was in a swimming pool. Let's move on.

Service. Were the staff friendly? Did they actually, like, *care*? Or were they trapped in a perpetual hotel-employee purgatory?

The staff… Okay. This is where things always get interesting. I recall one particular person. Let's just call her "Brenda". Now, Brenda. Brenda was a force. She was an *institution*. Probably. I bet she's still there. She had a look. You know the look. The look of someone who has seen it all. Seen a lot of questionable waffle making and maybe had to deal with a few… interesting characters. Brenda, bless her, was generally… efficient. Not overly friendly, but efficient. And listen, efficient in the world of Alton is a win! Okay? Cut her some slack! I bet she's got a secret stash of the good coffee.

Parking. Did I have to fight for a spot? Was it located?

Parking? Oh, YES! The GREAT PARKING. You know that feeling when you pull up to the hotel and it has so much parking that you can practically drive your car around the hotel and park where you want? Yeah, it was that. Easy. No drama. Easy parking. A godsend after a few hours on the road. It was a highlight!

Okay, the big question: Would you recommend it? (Be honest!)

Okay, here's the deal. It depends. Are you expecting the Ritz? NO. Are you looking for budget-friendly, a place to crash after a day of… Altoning? Then, yeah, it's probably fine. It's...an option. It's ALTON. What else you gonna do? Stay in your car? Probably not. Is it memorable? Somewhat, in a "Oh yeah, *that* place" kind of way. Would I go back?… Probably. But I might bring my own shampoo. And definitely my own coffee. And possibly Brenda's job if she ever decides to retire. Godspeed, Parkway Western Plus, Godspeed.

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Best Western Plus Parkway Hotel Alton (IL) United States

Best Western Plus Parkway Hotel Alton (IL) United States

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